Brucie B Clears His Throat!

SO! I’m at this bar, right? Knockin a few back with the big homie, riiight?? Dude. GUESS WHO WALKS IN?!?!?!

Yup! You guessed it! OWEN WILLLLLSON!!!!! Talk about good times! With extra cheese!

At age 26, I’m finally starting to settle into the idea that adulthood is inevitable. Now I’m not talking about paying bills and having responsibilities. That’s some regular shit. I’m talking about the concept of being a grown-ass kid.

I still dress like a kid (jeans, sneakers, baseball caps, sports jackets, etc), I don’t own even ONE business suit, and I stay up extra late. Every night of the week.

But today, I felt adulthood pull on me. I bought a muhfuckin box of Raisin Bran Crunch. And I think it PROMPTLY bumped Frankenberry off my “Top 5 All-Time Greatest Cereals” list!!!  This sparked many thoughts, and led me to perform a short evaluation of my life… I came up with these symptoms that I miiiiight be turning into one of those… adult thingies.

• I bought an adult ‘overcoat’ and a scarf last month. This is the first coat I’ve ever owned that didn’t have a zipper.
• I actually drink the ‘required’ 8, 8-oz glasses of water they tell you to drink every day (by the way… who are “THEY”?–hmm…I’ll save that for another time…)
• For at least 3 years now, i’ve been knocking youngsters (finish reading the sentence first, you nasty bastard) for fuckin up the music. From experience, I know it feels like dookie to be on the business end of “Whatchu know about that, youngin? You’re not old enough to remember that shit!”. but lately I’ve been dealing it out faster than a coke-head with a deck of cards at a spades tournament in Ray Ray’s backyard.

Yup, I think i’m gettin grown.

Ok I’m growing a bit concerned. Either these cats are all post-surgical Siamese twins, or everybody in the world REALLY has a double. I just hope MY double doesn’t end up making a flick.

I’m sure you have either seen or heard of this commercial by now. I STILL don’t know what to make of it… Its funny as shit, but I’m still trying to figure out if this is condescending or not. Even if this commercial was written by the KKK, “Gurl, you gotta 10 piece, please don’t be stingaaaaaayyy….” Is FLUCKIN HILARIOUS.